my head is dense- full of thought and action. I feel like i am being squeezed by a vice, like my hair is growing slowly in and not out. I feel like stress and intolerance ( the first word to come to mind) and milking inside of me, festering, growing like tumors.
I had a bad nightmare last night where the walls were leaking suspicious liquids and people I love were stabbed in places that I hold high and speak of safety to me- my catholic upbringing worships the church. I felt afraid and panicky and lost. I felt lost when I woke up as well, and out of place, frantic even and as though I just wanted to feel him beside him.
Truly not as though however, like I did. That's one thing of which i am consistently certain.
However my mind if full of aggravating melody and the migraine wont go away when I still hear percussion in my ears and mainly my jaw that feels like I have grinded down 89 bricks of gold. The dust has settled inside my eyes that tear up and my worry makes me clench my teeth harder and picking only provokes bleeding.
I've had a hard day, and a hard week to come.