i dont think a relationship was a good idea. nope, too many worries questions answeres little talking little vision completly blind deaf and dumb to everything.
it just makes me sad as usual. i wish i wasnt so filled with sadness and negative emotion, i need someone to love me. and i mean reaally love me. i want someone to care about me, not just date me, see me, makeout with me. i want them to mean it. him. him really. and i just doubt and trust and give nothing bad but bad energy. i dont deserve a relationship really but here i am in one, apparently, and can i even handle the negative?
this is what i got myself into and i dont even want to pull myself out of it. no one deserves my bad emotions and my constant untrusting wierd state of mind. and for that i will be posi, posi as possible. i will smile, not crym unless im in my bathtub by myself. for that i will change, its worth it to me.